Motorcycle Stunt Driving may soon be a crime in Missouri

Jefferson City Criminal Lawyer

Representative Jeff Roorda, A Democrat from the St. Louis area is back again with a bill to protect us from ourselves. His House Bill 1332 creates the crime of Motorcycle Stunt Driving.

Most new criminal laws are unnecessary and this one is especially so. But considering all the possible crimes we could commit, how cool would it be to have a conviction for Motorcycle Stunt Driving? To quote Will Smith’s character in the movie Independence Day: “I have got to get me one of these!”

To get one, you have to complete one or more of the following “dangerous stunts” while riding a motorcycle on a public road (presumably in front of a police officer):

  1. Standing on the seat, frame, or handlebars;
  2. Performing handstands on the seat, frame, or handlebars;
  3. Operating a motorcycle on one tire;
  4. Removing both hands from the handlebars

It’s kind of like taking your driver’s test, except there is no requirement that you do it very well.  (Keep in mind–however–it could be embarrassing to get a conviction for attempted Motorcycle Stunt Driving). Afterwards, you pay your fine and tell everyone you know that you have a conviction for motorcycle stunt driving.

You could become famous. There are web sites on how to break into the Hollywood Movie Stunt business.

If you’re really ambitious, move to Hollywood. When the movie producer wants to know your motorcycle stunt driving experience, you can whip out a certified copy and tell him, “Experience, hell, I’ve got a conviction.”

Even if you don’t want to get into the movies, a conviction for motorcycle stunt driving can only bolster your image. Everybody knows the ladies go for the bad boys. If you already have tattoos, then this is the next step. If you don’t have one, get your conviction record tattooed on your chest!


Come back with a warrant







Missouri bill would criminalize refusal to take breath test

People often hear that they should refuse to take the breath test if they are arrested for a DWI. Unfortunately–in the case of a simple first offense DWI–that belief will frequently result in worse results than if a person is convicted of the DWI. Refusal to blow will probably result in a one year revocation of that person’s Missouri drivers license.

A bill in the Missouri legislature takes a “refusal” to blow to a new level. SB 780, sponsored by Sen Matt Bartle, makes refusing to submit to chemical testing a separate crime, equivalent to a first-time DWI

In view of the heavy administrative penalty (one year revocation) already on the books, I am not certain how useful this provision will be. It creates a bizarre situation with regard to other statutes that still remain in effect. Section 577.041 requires the arresting officer to allow a DWI suspect twenty minutes in which to contact an attorney about whether to take the breath test.

It seems odd to specifically provide extra time for a suspect to call a lawyer to ask if he should commit a crime. This places the attorney in a situation of having to violate ethical rules if he makes any specific recommendation. I can imagine getting a phone call at 3:00 am:

Me: What can I do for you?

Suspect: I’m at the police station and I want to know if I should take the breath test? I got arrested for DWI.

Me: You are asking me if you should commit another crime?

Suspect: The cop said I could call a lawyer to see if I should blow.

Me: OK, here’s the deal. I can’t advise you to commit a crime. I could advise you to obey the law and take the test, but I can’t do do that either, because it could make your situation worse. However–wink, wink–If you do take the test, X will happen. If you don’t, Y will happen. Good luck.

This bill is hardly necessary, and–as the above shows–creates difficulties within the existing law.  It needs to fail.