Senate Bill to require DNA testing of litterbugs

blocksWhile other states are busy expanding the list of persons who must give DNA samples to include sex offenders and persons arrested for dangerous felonies, Sen John Loudon has introduced Senate Bill 557 to put Missouri lightyears ahead of the pack. At present, the law only applies to felons and sex offenders in Missouri.

The new bill forces anyone found guilty of ANY misdemeanor to give a sample of their DNA for the state DNA profiling system. This would apply to any person who is:

  1. sentenced to jail, or
  2. gets probation.

This is a whopping escalation, not only in the numbers of persons tested, but in the pettiness of offenses which will require DNA testing. Some of these include:

  • gambling
  • careless and imprudent driving
  • turn signal violations
  • peace disturbance
  • speeding (or driving too slowly)
  • sale of a motor vehicle on a Sunday
  • failure to return a rented video
  • cockfighting
  • bear wrestling
  • possession of an unregistered monkey
  • impersonating a hairdresser
  • entering a prohibited cave
  • sticking out arms on a roller coaster
  • releasing a swine
  • picking flowers by the roadside, and
  • littering.

One thing is for sure, serial litterbugs will think twice before they toss out that cup with their saliva all over the rim.